Pashto Proverbs
پشتو متلونه

S. S. Thorburn

From "Bannu: Our Afghan Frontier"

Topic: Friendship
ملګرتيا

The tone pervading most of the following is in general pure and elevated, and has a decidedly English ring about it. A man is not to be hasty in forming his friendships, but being formed, he is to hold his friend's honour as his own, and be willing to make any sacrifices for him, for "a world in purchase for a friend is gain." The distinction between true, luke-warm, and false friends is pointed out, and an occasional sly hit is dealt at the not altogether disinterested affection of relations, especially cousins and brothers, for each other.

• Make a friend; test him for a year: if he be proof, embrace him cordially; if not, cut his acquaintance
  يار نيسه، تر کاله ئي نيسه؛ که برابر شه، غېږ ورته نيسه؛ او که نه شه، ځان ځېني نيسه
  Polonius, in Hamlet, gives his son Laertes much the same advice in the lines beginning, "The friends thou hast, and their adoption tried, Grapple them to thy soul."
• Who forms a low friendship will light a fire on his own forehead
  چې بې زاته آشنائي کړه، اور به بل په خپل تندي کړه
  That his, will harm himself.
• Pass by your acquaintance in the street; forget his appearance
  يار په کوڅه تېر کړه، رنګ ئې هير کړه
  That is, do so when it is to your advantage to drop his acquaintance.
• Friends are serpents, they bit; Strangers are best, friends deceive
  ياران ماران دي خوړل کوي؛ نا آشنا ښه دي، آشنا ټګل کړي
  The false friend is here referred to.
• Mayest thou be damned O Blanket! which art neither for wind nor for rain
  ورک شې کمبلې چې نه د باد ئې نه د باران
  The lukewarm friend is here spoken of.
• Give good words to others, but good food to your friend
  ښه قصه بل ته کوه، ښه خواړه خپل ته ور کوه
  Be civil to all, but keep your substance for friends and relations
• Let a man have a dear friend, though he be in a foreign country
  يار دې وي، په بل ديار دې وي
• A son is the heart, a brother the eye's pupil, a grandson the bone's marrow
  ځوئې زړه دې؛ ورور ليمه دې؛ نمسې د هډ مازغه دې
  This gives the three degrees of affection.
• A son is from the heart, wealth from the liver; Wealth is dearer than a son
  ځوئې له زړه، دنيا له پرينه؛ تر ځوئ لا دنيا شرينه
• Who speaks of his friend, speaks of himself
  چې د يار وائي، له ځان وائي
  A man's friends are reflections of himself. "Tell me with whom you go, and I'll tell you what you are."
• The medicine for asking is giving
  د غوښتو دارو ور کړه دي
  A Spanish proverb runs, "When a friend asketh, there is no to-morrow"
• If you would keep friendship for your friend, don't regard his faults.
  چې له يار سره ياري لرې، عيب ته ئې مه ګوره
  Cassius spoke similarly to Brutus in Julius Caesar - A friend should bear a friends' infirmities.
• The friend appears in hard times, not at big dinners
  دوست په تنګسه کښۍ څرګندېږي، نه په خورنه کښۍ
  In most languages there are similar proverbs: thus in English we have "A friend in need is a friend indeed."
• When there was an earthquake, you would not give me the staff, now give it to your mother.
  چه زلزله وه ټنډئي دې رانه کړه، اوس ئې خپلې مور ته ور کړه
  This was the reply of a man to a false friend who had refused him the loan of a stick when he required it, and afterwards, when it was no longer wanted, pressed it on to him. It is now generally applied to friends who fail in the hour of need.
• Bear witness for God's sake, use a stick for a friend's
  ويل دې خدائ ده پاره کوه، او لوړ د يار د پاره وهه
• In what is fitting between you and me, What matters distance or propinquity?
  چې ځما اوستا بائده دي لرې او نژدي څه دي؟
• It is well to have your ass tethered, if you have a thief for a friend
  خپل خر تړلې ښه دې، که غل آشنا هم وي
• A friend will cause you to weep, an enemy to laugh
  خپل به دې ژړوي، او دښمن به دې خندوي
  That is, a true friend will always tell you your faults, an enemy will flatter you.
• Don't say O Brother! to him who is not (the son) of your mother
  چې نه دې وي له موره، داسې مه وايه چې وروره
• I will be your sacrifice, when free from business.
  هاله به در څاريږم، چې له چارې وزګارېږم
  That is, "Business first, friendship afterwards."
• Be either friendly or downright displeased
  لا يار شه، لا بيزار شه
• Its good to have a friend, though he be a ravenous dog.
  آشنا ښه دي که خوړونکښۍ سپي هم وي
• If I am good, it is owing to my friends
  که ښه يم، له يارانو سره ښه يم
• The brother is not of use to the brother, but the friend is to the friend.
  ورور ورور ته نه ګټي، خو مل خپل مله ته وګټي
  Brothers are often at variance, consequently, a man requiring help should apply to his friend rather than to his brother.
• I was with you to your house, but not to the grave.
  تر کوره اوم در سره، تر قبره نه يم در سره
  This is a rebuff to a presuming friend who asks too much.
• When the white cow licks the black, and the black does not return the favour, may her mouth rot! (literally "dry up")
  چې سپينه غوا ئې څټي او توره غوا ئې نه څټي خوله ئې وچه شه
  This is sometimes applied in cases where a rich man seeks a poor man's daughter in marriage, and his suit is refused. Generally, it means that favours must be reciprocated; if not, the person obliged deserves all manner of pains and penalties.
• Lighten if you are going to lighten. When Bada falls over the cliff, what will be the use of lightening?
  برېښوه که ئې برېښوې، خو چې بډه تر کمبر پرېوځي بيا به ئې څه ته برېښوې؟
  Bada; a Marwat, on a dark night is supposed to have thus addressed the clouds to give lightening. The meaning is, unless assistance is timely, it is of no use.
• A cousin is he, who in the morning sees your household's state, and in the evening your hearth fire burning.
  تربور دې هغه دې، چې صبا دې کور ځيروي، بيګا دې اور ځيروي
  That is, he first looks to see what you have in your larder, then drops in about dinner time. This is not very complimentary to the sincerity of a cousin's affection for his kindred.
• Friendship is good with the noble, not with the base.
  آشنائي په اصل ښه دې، نه په بې اصل
• A clever enemy is better than a stupid friend
  له کم عقله سجنړ نه هوښيار دښمن ښه دې
• If your relation kill you, he will bury you in the shade
  خپل دې که مړ کړي، سوري ته به دې واچوي
  That is, though you have a blood-feud with a relation and he will kill you, still he will see that your corpse gets a decent burial, but another would not do so. Blood is thicker than water after all.
• The nail and the flesh about it do not separate
  غوښه او نوک نه سره جلا کيږي
  Meaning amongst other things, that relations stick by each other.
• Who disregards the advice of his friends, will always carry on his head a load of anxieties.
  چې نه مني د يار، پندونه په سر به تل وړي د غم بارونه
• If you do not vex your own heart, you will not make another's happy.
  چې خپل زړه بد نه کړې، پردې زړه به ښه نه کړې
  That is, you must put yourself to inconvenience if you wish to be thought an obliging man.
• For a friend, the Hindu has eaten the flesh of a cow.
  د يار د پاره هندو د غوا غوښې خوړلي دي
  The cow is a sacred animal amongst Hindus. Meaning is, that to serve a friend a man would do an unlawful act.
• Though your cousin be an ass, don't throw your leg over him.
  تربور دې که خر هم وي، لته مه پرې اړوه
  That is, don't mount him, don't bully him, as he has it in his power to annoy you.
• Though the maiden be black, may my house be a sacrifice for her
  پيغله که توره وي، هم کور مې تر ځار شه
  That is, a man will sacrifice his all for what he loves, be the object insignificant or not. A corresponding proverb in Syriac is, "I love my friend, though he be a black slave."
• My friend is black, but so is black molasses, which is the best medicine for the wounded
  يار مې تور دې، خو تورې ګوړې لا تورې ګوړې د پرېکړيو دارو د وينې دې
  This is similar to the preceding proverb. Old black molasses is given for spasms, coughs, and other diseases, the cause of which is supposed to be an internal cut or wound.
• Be it gram, let it be with love
  چنډه دې وي، خو په مينه دې وي
  That is, a small favour graciously bestowed is as good as a great one.
• A strange horse is ridden half a stage.
  د پردي اس سواري تر نيمه منزله وي
  That is, being lent gratis, it will be a sorry mount. Refers to a casual acquaintance who is asked to do a service before acquaintance has ripened into real friendship.
• The heart is a unique thing when it becomes vexed; it is not a sheep to be slaughtered.
  زړه خو يو دې چې ملال شي، پسه نه دې چې حلال شي
  A man's affections are not to be trifled with; he is not like a sheep which you may slaughter and make an end of.
• The man who knows you eats you; the dog who knows you does not
  سړې چې د وپيژني اوبه دې خوري، او سپي چې دې وپيژني، نه به دې خوري
  Many a false friend will live on you, eat you out of your house and home; but a dog, unclean though he may be, is faithful to you to the last.
• A bear's friendship is to scratch and tear
  د ايژ دوستي څيرول دي
• In friendship the composite bracelet always breaks
  په ياري کښۍ تل څولي ماتېږي
  The 'Tsulai' is a cheap and very brittle bracelet, made up, I believe of clay and wax, and consequently easily broken. The meaning is, that friends must expect to make small sacrifices for each other.
• Would you look after yourself, cherish your friend; consider him not less than your brother
  ځان ته ګوره، ملګري ژغوره، کم ئې مه بوله له وروره
• Though you are an infidel, you are my liver
  که ته کافر ئې، ځما څګر ئې
  The liver here is the centre of affections. Religious differences do not interfere with true friendship.
• Two will become friends, if a third do not come between.
  دوه به سره خپل شي، که درېم په مينځ کښۍ نه وي
• A friend wishes you well in body, a brother in property (to which he hopes to succeed some day)
  يار دې د سر خير غواړي، او ورور به دې د مال
• At a public entertainment even may your friend be present
  په پنډه کښۍ دې هم سجنړ اوسه
  That is, at an entertainment open to all, to which the poorest and meanest go, may you find a friend for a friend is good under all circumstances.
• Every one is a dear friend in prosperity (literally "a good day")
  هر څوک په ښې ورځې کښۍ دوست دې
• If rain falls on you, drops will fall on me
  که په تا باران وشي، په ما به څاڅکي پرېوزي
  That is, a man's good fortune is that of his friends.
• Who loves, labours.
  چې ياري کوي، هغه خواري کوي
  Said originally of love, but in a wider sense of friendship.
• One doubt your love for me? No one has arrested Aba Sind ("father of waters, i.e., the Indus") with great dams.
  څوک چې ستا په مينې کښۍ و مــا ته که پندونه
  نـــــــه دې چــــــا نيولي ابـــــاسيند پــه لوې بندونه
  Used to express unlimited trust.
• Be intimate with a thief; take care of your ox.
  له غله سره پالي لره، خو خپل لنډي خوندي لره
  Meaning he will steal it if he can, friend though he may be; for a vicious man cannot be cured of his evil ways.
• Some one said to the woman, "Your lover is dead." She said, "Of which street?"
  لوئې ته چا ويل چې يار دې مړ شو، ويل ئې چې د کومې کوڅې؟
  Who is everybody's friend, is nobody's true friend.
• Brotherly love is all very well, but let there be some sort of account kept
  وروري وروري خو حساب له ميانه
• Until there be a rattle in the grain safe, there is no use in going and coming.
  په تله را تله نه شي، څو درز د څټي نه شي
  That is, there is no object in intercourse until one or both can benefit from it.
• I sweep the doorsteps of the Daramsal for my friend
  د يار له پاره ځه درمسال جاړو کؤم
  Daramsal is referred to as a Hindu Temple. The friend in his devotion says he can even sweep the doorsteps of it
• The affection showed be a donkey is a kick
  خره مينه لګته وي